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Tips for protecting yourself from a manipulative or perverse narcissistic colleague

  Written by Mary

If they run rampant in private, they could also be rife in the world of work. Charming at first, they turn out to be manipulative and harmful, emptying their victims of their personality. According to your zodiac sign, you have a quality that you can exploit when you come into contact with them. So, we suggest you take a look at it to protect yourself as much as possible. So make room for your astrological sign.

: Control Your Instinct

To repel your manipulative colleague, check your reactions. Because the more reactive you are, the more it will feed your energy as an emotional vampire. Do not play into their game and do your job without paying attention. If they continue to disturb you because of their assurance of hierarchical superiority, circumvent the organization to bring up the unhealthy profile of this colleague, preferably evidence in hand. Your hierarchy, knowing your investment at work, could probably help you.

Do Not Engage

To protect you in the best possible conditions, do not speak behind their back. The perverse narcissist feeds on your intimacy and your faults. If you are open-hearted, you are the perfect prey for them. So avoid exposing your life, (even to other colleagues). Know how to be silent and exchange with them in the most impassive way possible. Having no hold on you, they will abandon this target.

Detach from (False) Compliments

Do not fall into the trap of your manipulative colleague who offers you recognition and who acts as the only one who can give you unmatched appreciation. Disconnect these twisted connections in your mind and possibly get help from a coach or therapist to work on your emotional addiction. You might also understand what love is in healthy people around you, and that's what you need to tap into.

Specify Your Requests

Your manipulative colleague thinks they have won the jackpot with you thanks to your helpful nature. To unleash their perverted mind, they will send you orders without notifying you about what they really want from you. This is because you are ready to struggle to meet the demands of your leaders. Also, you will experience a feeling of guilt for not having satisfied their requests. That's why you should always write down their requests and comments. After which, you reformulate them clearly so that it confirms their messages or not.

Do Not Argue in Vain

You must be understanding with your perverse narcissist colleague. That is to say, if you start a debate of ideas to show that you are right, you will surely lose. You have to understand that with them you will never be right. Do not oppose them and never take what they tell you personally. To protect yourself, smile, and form short sentences that are mechanical and without emotion. In short, continue your life without fueling a wasted discussion.

Clarify Your Objectives

In your eyes, loyalty is a quality that can not be overused. Even more so in the area of work because it is an environment where you assert yourself. It is in your character to clarify things, especially if they are confused because of the way your fellow manipulator expresses them. Ask for clarification, even if a third party accompanies you. For example, to compare these unattainable goals with those of other colleagues, rationally.

Defend Yourself Legally

You are not one to let things go. All the more reason to exploit your potential to free yourself from the increasingly heavy chains imposed by your fellow manipulator. Make yourself smarter than them: wait for them to cross the line. Then learn about your rights! Check with staff representatives. You will feel stronger, and those who are willing to help you will give you advice and ways to protect yourself and defend yourself.

Go Into “Fog” Mode

Adopt the technique of fog. That is to say, you must mimic indifference to their possibilities. Whenever your "narcissistic pervert" colleague intervenes in your work, make your life toxic with exuberant behavior, ignore it. If they interact with you, give them vague answers. As a victim, you will migrate to a neutral and detached zone: they will let you go in search of a weaker person.

Use Your Words

If you are the victim of a manipulative colleague, do not lock yourself in your shell to dwell on private or public humiliation. For example, you can see the way they ask you the impossible, with contradictory objectives. Talk to neutral or well-meaning colleagues (whom you know well) to get out of this problem. Then find ways of protection: email your manipulator to clarify the instructions received while not forgetting to copy your hierarchy.

Refocus on Yourself

Sensitive in nature, you can let yourself be tempted by their beautiful words and their awful way of pretending to be a modest person. Once your morale is undermined by their criticisms and way of crushing you, you understand their ploy. You have to pull yourself together so that you do not let their charm seduce you. Get help to list your qualities and flaws. Be as realistic as possible! From there, you will find that you are not as mediocre as they describe.

Protect Your Radiant Facet

Stay away from them whenever possible. And do not show your extroverted and jovial side or your innocent and bright side, when they are around. Because the perverse narcissist likes to absorb everything they do not have by devitalizing their victim. Learn how to become stronger through an in-depth work with professional psychologists to no longer attract this kind of character. It is not a question of burying your zest for life but of not making it a trap for the perverse narcissist.

No Emotion or Effusion

Faced with the manipulative pressure exerted by a "narcissistic perverse" colleague, you must never show them your emotions. For if it begins to overflow through shouting matches or even tears, they know they have won. If you manage to behave as calmly as possible, they will feel lost, having found no weakness in you. Without emotion on your part, they will retreat.

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